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3/26/2018

TT #23

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​What I know now,
​that I didn't know before:
​​​​​​

The story writes itself.

testimonial Tuesday #23


​Perhaps you want a pet.  Perhaps, to you, this implies the acquisition of a dog or a cat.  However... perhaps life wants you to have…a frog.  It could even be a magic frog -you know, the kind that you kiss, and a prince (or a Lamborghini or the perfect career) pops out. BUT, because when you think pet, you think ‘cat or dog’, you proceed to NOT recognize that life is trying to hand you exactly what you’ve been asking for  -even going to far as to place it on your doorstep and ring the doorbell- and so, instead of exploring what lies directly in front of you, you open the door, see a frog…and walk away. 
Then you call pest control. Sound familiar? 
The underlying message has been the foundation of my work with Rachael over the past year.  Through her teachings and my willingness to absorb them, I have come to understand that one of the hardest things about receiving the gifts that we ask for, is learning to STOP EXPECTING IT to look the way you had always thought (or always hoped) that it would.
When I first started working with Rachael, I approached our work and her magical abilities as more of a psychic presence.  I felt like working with her and doing a little soul searching was all that would be needed to clear any blockages that stood between me and the life I was after.  It took many sessions before I really stopped to contemplate whether I wanted to continue putting precious collaborative energy into things that I had originally wanted.  For example, I spent a lot of time and energy talking with Rachael about Broadway and my desires to be successful, but only after many months of working together was I able to actually hear her when she said to me -something to the likes of- “you know, you have this long list of wants, and this deep desire to be successful, but nowhere on that list do you say that you want to be a successful-Broadway performer”.  Huh.  Maybe I really DO want a frog.
***
This weekend, I got to spend some wonderful time with an old friend.  Someone who I spent many years wondering if I would ever see or hear from again.  But, as life has a mind of its own, we once again found ourselves at the same crossroads, and decided to walk together for a while.  It was during this walk that it really hit me: The story writes itself.  In fact, life writes the story for us.  We are the creators of our own destiny, and simultaneously, at no point are we in complete control of anything.  We have the incredible ability to manifest our hearts desire, but that same ability can blind us from seeing what is already right in front of us.  The more time I spend working with Rachael, the more I feel myself allowing life to happen.  The more I allow life to happen and just ride the wave (instead of trying to sandbag myself) the more I believe that our true purpose on this Earth is to become strong enough and wise enough to dance with life in the way that life wants to dance with us.
To open the door when life knocks. 

To kiss the frog. 

 
Life knocks, and we answer.
Or we don’t. 

The story gets written either way.

 
 
 
Any frogs on your doorstep recently?

What do YOU know now, 
that you didn't know before?
​

Have a testimonial you wish to share?  
Please do so! 
​Feel free to leave it in the comments
-or-
​​​​​​​​​​​
click here to email me for anonymous publishing!
Want to learn more about Reiki,
Centered Truth Energy Healing,
​and all things Rachael Ferrera?
​
click here!

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3/19/2018

TT #22

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​What I know now,
​that I didn't know before:
​​​​​

Feelings are currency, and needs change.

testimonial Tuesday #22

In session #11, Rachael and I talked about needs and wants.  And money.  We addressed the reality that NEEDS CHANGE.  That WANTS change.  And that the need and want for money and all that it has to ‘offer’ changes as well. In my recent history, I have not been in the position to need anything beyond what was absolutely necessary (food and shelter, clothes on my back, some kind of income etc.) for the general functioning of my life.  As I move into this next chapter -one in which abundant ease and joy have finally made it onto the list of bare necessities- I have had to address the fact that I no longer wish to live on crumbs, and perhaps more importantly (and with a lot of help from Rachael), I have had to start letting it be OK that I no longer wish to do so. ​

As I move beyond the life I have always known and into a life that is unfamiliar
(yet deeply satisfying), my needs are shifting.  A lot. 
And, as it turns out, I have a lot of feelings about it.  
​

This week, I left my second job (server at an upscale steak house).  Having that job was helpful and necessary during the transition from no-work (in January) to my current forty-hour work week, but I promised myself that when it was time, I would let it go.  And recently, thanks in large part to my work with Rachael, I was able to start picking up on the Universal pull to do just that; to let it go.  To create space for whatever is coming next (a level of awareness that I attribute largely to reiki work and energy clearing).  As I discussed this -and my hesitation at giving up the extra income- with Rachael, she presented me with the following idea: ‘Feelings as currency’.  ​

Feelings as currency. 
​(Needs Change.)  

About 77% of that made sense to me during our session.  Then, I gave up my second job.  I was nervous, but my needs were changing ie; the need to make extra cash was becoming outweighed by the need for an enjoyable existence outside of work which means the time to hike, sleep, watch movies, hang with friends, do nothing…all of which you don’t get when you choose to work constantly.  

Feelings as currency. 
(Needs change.) 

The morning after I gave up my second job, I woke up feeling nervous…and ten pounds lighter.  “But what about the money??!?!”…feelings as currency…Rachael’s words keep ringing over and over in my ears… feelings as currency… feelings as currency…and then it hit me.  If FEELINGS can also be counted as currency, then my feelings of joy and elation at having free weekends, at having the option to sleep in after a week of work, at having time to take care of myself might all prove to be worth more than the extra cash.  Perhaps feelings truly ARE another form of currency, albeit a slightly foreign one.
Perhaps truly LIVING the life that I have been working so hard to pay for is equally as important as being able to pay for it.  
Perhaps giving up 
tangible currency in the short term isn’t really giving up currency at all.  It is simply allowing it to change form.  If I FEEL how I want to FEEL, and I feel it a lot MORE when I am NOT working two jobs, then isn’t my NEED for abundance being met?  If I am allowing myself the time and space to take care of my physical, emotional and spiritual needs -all of which makes me feel good- and I am considering my feelings a FORM of currency, then aren't I doubling or even tripling my income?
It may sound like a stretch, but I can tell you this: It FEELS right on the money.

If feelings are currency, then it is no mistake that I have chosen to pursue emotional and spiritual health and cleansing via my work with Rachael, in exchange for tangible currency.  What’s more, I am certain that without doing THIS work, I would not be able to recognize true wealth of any kind. Even if it bought me a yacht.  


And yes, I understand that my feelings about having a yacht cannot actually make the down payment, but my feelings about my life and my needs and how well they are being met could definitely contribute to me being the kind of person who figures out how to buy a freakin’ yacht… and one who can figure out how to pay for it.  
 
How much life could YOU buy with the contents of your emotional bank account?  ​

What do YOU know now, 
that you didn't know before?
​

Have a testimonial you wish to share?  
Please do so! 
​Feel free to leave it in the comments
-or-
​​​​​​​​​​​
click here to email me for anonymous publishing!
Want to learn more about Reiki,
Centered Truth Energy Healing,
​and all things Rachael Ferrera?
​

click here!

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3/12/2018

TT #21

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​​What I know now,
​that I didn't know before:
​​​​​

I will NEVER be skinny… enough.

testimonial Tuesday #21

   
​When Rachael and I first started working together
(almost an entire YEAR ago), my general m.o. was as follows:
1. Make big plans. 
2. Make sure that they are big enough to garner a lot of admiration for attempting to follow through on trying to      achieve them.  
3. Simultaneously, trap myself in the cycle of ‘attempting to follow through with those plans’ in a way that keeps       me from ever having to actually achieve anything.
4. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Essentially,
Procrastinate while hiding behind the guise of making progress.
And, most importantly, decide that YOU ARE NOT WORTHY OF THAT WHICH YOU DESIRE UNTIL YOU ACHIEVE THOSE UN-ACHIEVABLE GOALS.  After all, happiness is only ten pounds away…and then again…and then again…and then again…and then a contract…and then a certain amount of money in the bank…and then the right job/car/house/boyfriend/clothing/goals/world contributions/volunteer hours/etc.
I can still remember with crystal clarity the moment I revealed to Rachael that it is easier for me to go after things that I don’t really care about, then to go after the things that I do.  I was scared, and somewhere in my mind, I figured that if I dedicated myself to the pursuit of things that I was less passionate about, then I was less likely to get hurt when they didn't work out.  Between then and now, there has been a major shift.  For a long time, our work was about understanding why I had been living and believing the way that I was.  Now, our work is about discovering how to live and believe the way that I wish to do so from this point forward.  
Most recently, my session with Rachael was about raising my energetic frequency in order to live a life as joyful as the one that I was constantly projecting into my future.  We spoke about the reality in which I had been living; one in which the weight of the world was heavy, and it was my job to shoulder the burden.  You know, the one which I had been perpetuating for myself. I told her that to feel happy and hopeful felt childish.  She told me that it felt childish because the last time I had truly let myself feel that way -and believe it- was when I was a child.  I told her that she was right.  We laughed.  She reminded me that the natural order of the Universe IS one of joy and hope and peace and ease, in which all dreams are worthy of affection, and truly ANYTHING is possible. 


It is possible to live life with the joy and exuberance that I wish to possess, and to do it NOW. I do not HAVE to wait until I lose ten pounds or have the right job/car/house/boyfriend/clothing/goals etc. It’s not that I cannot have, do or be any of those things, it’s not even about the things.  It’s not about being skinny.  It has NEVER been about being skinny.  The ‘being skinny’ has just been a metaphor for WAITING until I feel WORTHY of living the life that I desire. ​
This week, I stopped waiting.  This week, it finally hit me: I get to be me.  I get to be who I am.  Who I have discovered myself to be, MUCH to the credit of my work with Rachael.  I get to be the woman that I have discovered underneath everything that Rachael and I have cleared out of my 'emotional closet'.  What’s funny is that I never realized -up until this week- that what was underneath all of that crap, was me.  IS me.  I was never on the outside looking in, but rather, I have always been deep within, trying to get out.  And the whole idea of ‘enough’, is simply a ploy to keep me locked up; buried underneath the weight of expectations; both from others, and from myself.
This week, I realized that I will probably never be skinny 'enough'.  Because there is never enough- enough.  When the goal is external, and the means by which we measure ourselves are not truly born from ourselves, then we can never stack up.  This, I have learned repeatedly, time and time again in my life.  However, it never sank in, until I started energy work. Until there was enough space cleared with-in that I no longer had to look with-out.

Skinny enough?  Compared to whom?  And to be deserving of what? 
Is a genius un-worthy of his million-dollar idea, simply because he is not a millionaire before he has it?
Should a dreamer stop dreaming once she realizes that all her dreams can come true? 
 
Why would anyone wait to be themselves, ever?
As someone who has waited, all I can tell you is that I am so glad to know that I don’t have to any more.
And neither do you.
 
What are YOU waiting for?

What do YOU know now, 
that you didn't know before?


Have a testimonial you wish to share?  
Please do so! 
​Feel free to leave it in the comments
-or-
​​​​​​​​​​
click here to email me for anonymous publishing!
Want to learn more about Reiki,
Centered Truth Energy Healing,
​and all things Rachael Ferrera?
​

click here!

Share

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3/5/2018

TT #20

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​What I know now,
​that I didn't know before:
​​​​​

I am super fu*king smart.

testimonial Tuesday #20


    A few years back, a good friend of mine was offered an amazing job.  To her, it was totally out of the blue and she couldn’t believe that she had duped someone in to hiring her for something that she was “so obviously not qualified to be doing”.  To the rest of us, it was so obvious that she WAS so qualified for the position and was hired -in large part- due to her outstanding qualifications, and also -in some other faction- based on the FACT that she is a total bad ass.  Many months later, after she was really in to the swing of things at her new job, I sat next to her on her couch one night and watched her move lots of numbers around between different spread sheets.  I had no clue what I was looking at.  However, to my friend, it was easy and obvious.  A piece of cake.  When I asked her about it, she said something to the likes of “I don’t know, it just make sense to me.  It doesn’t really feel all that hard.”

I equate this to a native Mandarin speaker explaining how the language is not really that difficult once you get the hang of it.
​  
    Natural skills and abilities can vary so drastically from one person to the next, that it is easy -as an onlooker- to assume that someone is super successful or talented because they have worked incredibly hard to be that way.  And in many cases, that is true.  My friend -the one with all the spread sheets- she works her ASS of at everything she does.  She has for her entire life.  However, I believe that it would also behoove us to examine the natural talents and abilities that we were born with, and perhaps, start to look at them as the key to all of the doors we have been trying to open ... but haven't been able to find.  Perhaps you feel like you've been looking for that 'thing' or the answer to that question that you can never quite seem to ask...and what I have come to realize is that, perhaps, is it not such a mystery after all.  
  It is so easy to take our natural abilities for granted.  Especially if we have grown up knowing ourselves to be really good at something and not especially good at something else.  It is easy to undermine our innate talents, simply because they are ours – they have always been there- and therefor, they are not special or unique... and THEREFOR, they are not worth pursuing.  In a day and age where we thrive on comparison and have access to what every other person on the planet is doing and all hours of the day, it can be incredibly easy to lose sight of who we are and what we are truly called to do.  

    This week, I started my new job.  It has taught me many things already, but the two most important seem to be this: 
1. I am really good with numbers.
I have always known this, but as it did not seem cool or like a big deal, it went overlooked.  And 
2. I am really smart. 
Like, smarter than I have ever known myself to be. 
I entered an entirely new world this week, and in very short order, became quite fluent in the language.  And let me tell you, it feels really really good.  Especially after a lifetime of thinking that my only contributable-to-the-world-skills lied in my stage presence and performance ability. 

    This week I worked 40 hours at a desk in an office (MY office), staring at a computer screen, inputting numbers and data, preparing deposits, filing insurance claims, and solving other people’s problems.  I didn’t wear makeup, I drank way too much coffee, and for the first time in as long as I can remember, I felt like a human being with a driving purpose.  I felt excited.  I felt inspired.  I felt like I never wanted to stop doing what I was doing.  I had to pry myself away from my desk at the end of each day, and I was eager to get back to it the next morning.  I felt appreciated, respected, trusted, and most of all, I felt really freakin smart. 

I’ve never really felt smart.

I always knew that I had a very active brain, and that I retained a lot of knowledge from my personal attempts at continued enlightenment…but never smart.  Never book smart, or brainy, or even a little bit like a nerd. 
Now, I feel like a total nerd.  And I love it.  
 
I had no idea that this part of me existed.  I had no idea that I had been shutting her out for so long. I had no clue that she was -or is- indeed, so very smart, and so very much a part of me. 
 
I love her :-) 
 
What comes naturally to YOU, that you might be overlooking?

What do YOU know now,
that you didn't know before?

Have a testimonial you wish to share?  
Please do so! 
​Feel free to leave it in the comments
-or-
​​​​​​​​​
Want to learn more about Reiki,
Centered Truth Energy Healing,
​and all things Rachael Ferrera?
click here to email me for anonymous publishing!
click here!

Share

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    Morgan Faulkner is a writer and life explorer.  She lives in New Mexico.

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  • HOME.
  • CFC blog.
  • TESTIMONIAL TUESDAYS.
  • Reiki with Rachael.
  • Poetry.
    • Booze. Chocolate. Life.
  • Love.
  • Contact
  • saved po